


The Years Never Stop

by solidsnakessolidcakes



Series: Joy Of Parenting [2]
Category: Metal Gear
Genre: F/F, M/M, The title was inspired by "the years keep comin and they dont stop comin", Trans Character, Trans Liquid Snake, baby gays, good luck cause I havent gotten much better, ha, trans mantis, well b Im back, you thought it was gone didnt you
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-09-10
Updated: 2019-10-08
Packaged: 2020-10-13 08:47:07
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 16
Words: 11,592
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20579738
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/solidsnakessolidcakes/pseuds/solidsnakessolidcakes
Summary: As the small group of children they had gathered advanced to the next grade, they started inching closer.





	1. Chapter 1

There wasn't much to be said about summer time. Other than that, well, it was hell.

Apparently when Eli had nothing to do he became restless. _Very_ restless. This meant endless summer activities to keep him busy, and countless events to go to.

Somewhere along the way Quiet had come back, promptly adopting Mantis and moving into an apartment shortly down the street. That meant that Eli was constantly moving between houses. Half the time they didn't even know where he was.

Kaz had also let V sleep in his bed with him. Now this went well until he remembered that V had always been very empathetic. And since Mantis was gone, Eli had constant PTSD-fueled nightmares that left him shaking and crying, and of course, V always let him sleep in their bed for comfort.

The first time it happened it was right before school started, shortly after Quiet had taken Mantis away.

Really they were both asleep when the door opened, but the uncharacteristically soft "oh," and move to leave was what woke up V, which promptly woke up Kaz.

"What's wrong kiddo?" V asked gently, rubbing his eyes. Eli stood in the doorway like a deer caught in the headlights, his legs shaking at tears in his eyes.

"I-I... I uh, like, I had- a- a nightmare." It was odd, Mantis had always been the one with a stuttering problem, hearing Eli stumble over his words like that felt... unnatural.

V got up, walking silently over to the child. He lifted him up and walked back to bed, setting him in between him and Kaz.

"V- no."

"He's crying! You're just gonna leave him out there?"

Kaz sighed deeply, running a hand over his face. Eli shifted uncomfortably before laying down, resting his head on Kaz's arm. He practically froze.

"Do you wanna talk about it?" Kaz asked, finally relaxing. Eli's tears seemed to pick up a bit and he got choked up, or at least, more choked up. "It's okay, you don't have to."

They sat in silence for a few seconds, and Kaz almost fell back asleep, when he spoke again.

"I... At the facilities, they would send me to... they would sometimes leave me in these cabinets- for punishment. They would uh, isolate me, leave me completely alone."

The room remained silent after that. It was an unspoken rule in the house that you never spoke of how exactly Eli and David were made, or the things they had to go through because of it.

Kaz laid there, awake, as Eli drifted off, eventually followed by V. He had always felt bad for Eli, he just didn't know how bad it truly was.

From then on it became a routine. At least once a week Eli would come into their room crying, they'd let him crawl into their bed, and if they were lucky he'd tell them what was bothering him. Often times it had to do with the facilities he was kept at. Really Kaz didn't blame him for having nightmares, from what he had heard he would've too.

It was a rare occasion that the twins took naps- but especially Eli. In fact, Eli tended to avoid sleep altogether. It was mildly concerning, but Kaz wasn't exactly sure how to bring it up.

The one time they finally did get him to nap they expected some peace and quiet. All the kids were asleep. They last thing they expected was everyone three apartments over being woken up by the loudest scream he'd ever hear a person muster.

V ran into the room, followed closely by Kaz, both worried something had happened. Instead they saw Hal and Dave glaring sleepily at Eli, who was in the midst of a full-blown meltdown.

"Eli? What happened?" He asked gently, kneeling in front of him. He just frantically shook his head, grabbing at his hair.

"What's wrong with him?" Asked Hal, promptly yawning.

"He's just having some problems, kid," V answered softly, "Why don't you two go watch a show or something?"

That's when Kaz realized that no one other than him, V, and likely Mantis had seen him like this. He felt a small pang of sympathy, Eli had always hated people seeing him any kind of vulnerable.

Once the other two kids left the room V joined Kaz on the floor. "What happened, Eli?"

"I-I-"

"Do you wanna go back to sleep?"

"No!" He pulled back, his wide-blown, glossy eyes looking terrified.

"Hey, shhh, it's okay, we're not gonna force you to do anything. Just talk to us."

Eli sniffled, shaking for a few seconds. "I don't- I don't want to talk about it."

"Alright. We just need you to not scream like that, you woke everyone up."

"I screamed?"

"Yes, Eli. It's okay, we just need you to not do this again."

"Okay. I- I'm sorry."

"Do you want us to leave you alone?"

"No."

"Do you want to watch a show?"

He hesitated, nodding silently.

V lifted him up, helping Kaz back to his feet.

Somehow Kaz had never grasped how bad Eli's childhood had been.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry to give a sad one right off the bat hhhh


	2. Chapter 2

As Eli grew older it almost seemed like he was becoming more and more sensitive.

The first unit in life science was the bug unit.

This is a long winded way of saying that somewhere along the line he developed a fear of bugs.

A _bad _one.

Luckily this was one of the few classes Mantis joined him in. (Once Junior High started they had few classes together.) So, while Mantis watched with an innate curiosity and love, Eli clung to him, trembling as he clenched his eyes shut.

[It's just a fly, Eli.]

_[Yeah but it's so big!]_

[It's just zoomed in, it's not even the size of your fingernail.]

And them came the bug collection project.

Needless to say Eli was entirely unable to get the minimum ten bugs in time by himself. In fact, over the course of the summer he had only become more and more nervous. It was a bit concerning.

Each time a bug appeared he would pin himself either against a wall or curl up in the center of the room, crying the whole time. Mantis had to capture them, and he didn't have the heart to kill them, so that job was left to David.

They barely managed to get it done on time.

He was holding the egg carton away from him, with a flimsy grip. Mantis had to float it to make sure it didn't fall.

Then they got to science class.

It was fine for the first twenty minutes or so. Mostly just tiny whimpers. Then they were told to grab the bugs.

didn't even make it to the back. He instantly burst into tears, curling in on himself. 

"Eli?" Mantis asked quietly, grabbing onto his shoulders. He instantly jerked away, letting out a little whine.

"I can't- ohgod oh god oh god..." He cried harder, tears falling quickly and _loudly._

The teacher walked over quietly, looking concerned. Eli was shaking, holding his head and clenching his eyes shut.

"Are you okay?"

_[I can't move I can't do this]_

[Eli calm down. It's fine, they're just bugs!]

_[I'm- I can't- I feel like they're on me-]_

[Eli it's okay.]

"Do you wanna go out to the hall for a bit?" The teacher asked gently, "Tretij here can help you and you won't have to look at them."

"I can't-" his voice was mixed with sobs and what he was trying to said was drowned out.

"He can't move."

"Is he hurt?"

"No he's just- he's scared."

A girlish shriek escaped Eli's mouth, tensing even more.

[What happened?]

_[I felt something on me!]_

[Eli all of the bugs are dead.]

"Oh my god is that thing moving? Didn't you put a pin in it? Why isn't it dead!?"

Great timing.

Eli sobbed harder, his whole body shaking violently. He had his forehead resting on his knees, his arms curled up around his head as if protecting it.

How on earth did class go on while one of their classmates was crying so loudly?

Mantis hesitated before slipping his jacket over Eli's shoulders, hoping he gained some kind of comfort from it. His wild emotions had started to give Mantis a headache.

By the time the bugs were all put away Eli had started to calm down, clutching onto Mantis' jacket.

[Are you okay?]

_[And that, is called a mental breakdown.]_

Mantis snorted, hugging him. [See you at math.]

_[Yeah. Sorry.]_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> love how I immediately forgot to post this on saturday  
oops


	3. Chapter 3

The fun part about being a genetically engineered super-soldier is that you're apparently very good at fitness testing.

The bad part about being chronically malnourished and short is that you are apparently _not _very good at fitness testing.

Gym was one of the few classes Mantis and Eli had together. Sure, he was glad to be by his friend, but sometimes it just made him feel... guilty.

It didn't help much that Dave was in their class too.

So while those two were always running around, being perfect at every sport thrown at them, Mantis was just... mediocre, at best.

But that was just how it always was. He was never one of complain very much. Plus, Eli always went with them when they had choice time. They would often walk along the track just talking. It was nice.

But fitness testing... it was very, very different.

Mantis had always hated it. No matter what year, between his two years of schooling, he had despised fitness testing. It seemed ridiculous to pin a grade onto something physical.

Eli had his hair tied up into a ponytail. That was the only good thing about it. He liked how he looked like that. Then again he tied his hair up most days in gym.

_"The fitness gram pacer test is a multi-aerobic..."_

He always thought the little intro thing was silly.

When it started it was just a fast walk, at most. Of course Mantis had to speed-walk a bit more intensely than everyone else. He was about 3/4 the size he should've been.

But damn, it really did seem to speed up quickly.

By the time they got to twenty Tretij was breathing heavily, his tiny legs carrying him as well as they could. Which was, not well.

The blurring of his vision was exasperated by the lenses of his gas mask, especially since they were starting to fog up with a mix of his sweat and heavy breathing.

He was just about to give out when next to him Eli checked to see if the teachers were looking. They weren't, they never were. He then grabbed his hand.

_[Float.]_

The recording beeped just as Mantis lifted his feet just barely off the ground. Damn, Eli was truly a genius at times.

He did his best to make it look like he was still running, while in fact, Eli was just dragging him along.

It was... nice.

He stopped at around thirty-five. He wanted to seem realistic, after all.

He took his place in the sidelines, sitting entirely alone. Sure, it was a little depressing, but he was more focused on Eli.

It was amazing. At some point it was only him and Dave left. And he didn't even look tired.

Mantis started smiling. Eli was truly amazing. Sure, he knew he was strong, but it never truly registered with him until now.

At some point Dave finally dropped out, looking sweaty and exhausted. But Eli was still going.

He got into the hundreds.

Mantis smiled wider.

Finally Eli dropped out at around a hundred ten. He was less sweaty than Dave, but still pretty damn sweaty.

Mantis ran up to hug him. He wasn't entirely sure why, he just wanted to. It was so impressive, what he could do.

* * *

That night Mantis and Eli had a sleepover. It was actually a pretty common occurrence, but this was the first time they'd gotten a chance during the school year. Usually they did it at least once a week.

Currently Mantis was snuggled up against Eli's stomach. He had been getting taller. Mantis hadn't.

_[How are you so tiny?]_

[I don't know. I think it's a psychic thing.]

_[Oh, well, I think it's cute. I can lift you with one arm.]_

[you could do that before.]

_[I guess.]_

They sat in silence for a few minutes. Neither of them could sleep.

_[Wanna know a secret?]_

[Sure.]

_[I'm not a real boy.]_

[Yes, you are.]

_[No, like, I have- I was born a girl.]_

[Do you like being called a boy?]

_[Yeah.]_

[Then you are.]

_[I dunno. Everyone said I was a girl but when I got into Africa it was just an automatic response.]_

[You're a boy if you want to be a boy.]

**** _[Everyone thinks my name is Elija. It's weird. Technically my name is Elizabeth.]_

[Do you want to be called Eliza?]

_[No.]_

[So it's not your name. You are not controlled by pre-decided factors- in most cases. There are things you can do and say and get that can change everything.]

_[... You're a good friend, Mantis.]_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this definitely isn't historically accurate but um an alternative title for this 'Me Venting About School"


	4. Chapter 4

Kaz had gotten an email.

He actually didn't check it that often, so a more accurate sentence would be:

During the summer Kaz got an email.

It was from a nonsensical email. It looked to be just key smashes.

But the contents was what was interesting to him.

> _ from uysyugfie48jvnsfjksou@yahoo.com  
To: Peacemiller@gmail.com  
_ _ Subject: See attachment_
> 
> _[Image]_
> 
> _[Image]_
> 
> _[3 attachments]_

Kaz furrowed his eyebrows. With his life style, or well, how he used to live, it was good practice to be suspicious.

He opened the first image.

It was hard to tell what it was for a few seconds. When he managed to make it out, he saw a Polaroid of Big Boss, a Japanese woman, EVA, and another woman with not many defining features. Across the top it read _Les Enfant Terribles_.

That caught his attention.

Clearly this was a Cipher document. From what he could understand from the text, the Japanese woman was the egg donor for EVA, and the other woman was another surrogate.

But that made no sense.

EVA carried twins- Eli and David. Why would there be another surrogate?

He opened the next image. It was a military application. For a man named George Sears. It said he was twenty. He looked twenty, if a bit matured.

How the hell were these to connected?

He opened the attachments next.

The first contained another 2 Polaroids. One of a blonde baby, red-faced from crying. The other of a well-mannered looking little girl with a shirt that was about as feminine as it could get without being what a normal child would wear. She looked suspiciously like Eli, with the slightly rounded nose and wide set eyes.

> _Les Enfant Terribles- Subject No. 1, Soldier Genes Only_
> 
> _Legal Name- Elizabeth [REDACTED]_
> 
> _Birth Date- 1972, June, 12_
> 
> _Code Name- Liquid Snake_
> 
> _Sex- Female_
> 
> _Growth- Regular, slightly below average height_
> 
> _Height (Age 11)- 137 cm_
> 
> _Eye Color- Blue_
> 
> _Hair Color- Blonde_
> 
> _Skin Tone- Fair, prone to tanning, freckles, tooth gap_
> 
> _Academics_ _\- Knows Spanish, English, getting good grades, stubborn_

> _Physical Fitness- Fit, good runner_

> _Locations- [REDACTED], [REDACTED], [REDACTED], [REDACTED], [REDACTED], Escaped- Facility No. 2_
> 
> _Current estimated position- Somewhere in Africa, off the waters of Seychelles_
> 
> _Potential Aliases- The White Mamba (Nyoka ya Mpembe), [REDACTED], [REDACTED], [REDACTED]_

Kaz narrowed his eyes. The photos looked like Eli, and Liquid Snake was supposed to be his code name. Everything on here would indicate that it would be Eli, except for one thing.

Eli was a boy.

So why in fuck's name is he listed as a girl?

Not to mention he was constantly going off about how he was the "inferior" one, so why was he listed as the one with the soldier genes!?

He decided to push it off for a bit, opening the next attachment.

It was a similar file, this time with a picture of a different baby, this one a bit more well-mannered. Then, another of a young boy who was definitely David.

> _Les Enfant Terribles- Subject No. 2, No Soldier Genes_
> 
> _Legal Name- David [REDACTED]_
> 
> _Birth Date- 1972, June, 12_
> 
> _Code Name- Solid Snake_
> 
> _Sex- Male_
> 
> _Growth- Regular, slightly below average height_
> 
> _Height (Age 11)- 143 cm_
> 
> _Eye Color- Green_
> 
> _Hair Color- Brown_
> 
> _Skin Tone- Fair, minimal tanning_
> 
> _Academics_ _\- Average grades_

> _Physical Fitness- Fit, good runner_

> _Locations- [REDACTED], [REDACTED], [REDACTED], [REDACTED], [REDACTED], [REDACTED], [REDACTED], [REDACTED], [REDACTED], [REDACTED], [REDACTED], [REDACTED], [REDACTED], [REDACTED], [REDACTED], [REDACTED], Disappeared_
> 
> _Current estimated position- Unknown_

It all lined up. These two were Eli and Dave. It was weird, though, little things that didn't line up.

He opened the next attachment.

It was the same damn file, this time with a different baby, and a much older looking boy.

> _Les Enfant Terribles- Subject No. 3, Perfect Copy_
> 
> _Legal Name- George [REDACTED]_
> 
> _Alias- George Sears_
> 
> _Birth Date- 1972, June, 12_
> 
> _Code Name- Solidus Snake_
> 
> _Sex- Male_
> 
> _Growth- Regular, above average height_
> 
> _Height (Age 11)- 188 cm_
> 
> _Eye Color- Blue_
> 
> _Hair Color- Brown_
> 
> _Skin Tone- Fair, minimal tanning_
> 
> _Academics_ _\- Average grades_

> _Physical Fitness- Very fit_

> _Locations- Santa Barbara, United States, Military_
> 
> _Success of Accelerated Aging: Very good, looks twice his age_

Suddenly Kaz understood.

The project went deeper than he thought.

There was a third child out there.

He felt a little sick. Three children doomed to a life of killing, simply because Cipher wanted it?

He put his head down for a split second.

"V!" He called, and instantly he was there. "Can you shut the door?"

The door squealed on its hinges. V looked worried.

"There's a third child."

"Right, Tretij Rebenok, it means third child."

"No. A third product of Les Enfant Terribles."

"What?"

"His name is George."

"Oh no."

"I got an email- these are official Cipher documents- it contains all of their files."

"Can I see?"

Kaz moved aside a bit so V could see the screen.

"It says Eli is a girl."

"Yeah."

"They can't be real, then."

"We could ask him."

"I don't wanna upset him."

"V, we can't just leave a child out there!"

"... Alright, fine. Eli! Can you come in here please?"

Eli walked in quietly. Now that Kaz thought about it, his puberty had started remarkably early, closer to the time a girl's would start. Not to mention he was always sort of feminine in a way, not obviously, of course, kids don't have much difference until they hit puberty, so one gender could easily pass as another...

"Alright, um... How do I ask this? Eli, are you a boy or a girl?"

"A boy." He said it in such confidence you almost couldn't catch the way he hesitated.

"Well- are you a male or female?"

"Male."

Kaz looked up at V hopelessly.

"Eli- do you pee sitting down?" V winced even as he said it.

Eli hesitated, before nodding.

"Oh god..." Kaz put his head down.

"Do you want us to keep calling you a boy?"

"Yes! Because I am! I am a boy! I don't wanna be a girl! I'm a boy!" He crossed his arms almost protectively, starting to raise his voice.

"Okay, okay, Eli."

They sat in silence for a few seconds before Eli started to tear up.

"I-I think I need a b-bra or something..." His voice was tiny and mixed with small sobs.

"We'll do everything we can to make you comfortable, okay Eli? We can change your name, we can get you training bras- anything." V knelt down, placing a hand of Eli's head.

"Thank you." He hugged him, still crying heavily.

"It'll all be okay, alright? We'll be okay. You'll be okay. Everything will be fine."


	5. Chapter 5

So apparently tracking down a twelve year old who looked twenty was harder than Kaz thought.

Not to mention he had to deal with Eli trying to insist that they didn't tell the school.

"For your own health we have to tell them."

"No! Then they'll make me go into the girls' bathroom and put me in the girls' swim class- Don't tell them!"

"Eli we need to."

"No!"

This was a common conversation- or, well, argument, in the household now.

They were going through it again when Eli suddenly started _sobbing._

"Please don't tell them! I don't wanna be a girl anymore! I wanna be a boy! I'm a boy! Not a girl! I don' wanna b' a girl!" He collapsed onto the ground, crying loudly.

"Hey- Eli, what happened?" V asked gently, lifting him into his lap.

"I don' wanna be a girl! I don' wanna!"

"You're not, Eli. You're a boy."

"I hate this I hate it! I hate it! I hate this- this-"

That was concerning.

While Eli was a pretty angry person, he rarely said he hated anything. Other than his father, of course.

Kaz crouched down.

"Hate what, Eli?"

"I hate being a girl! I don' wan' to! I's so gross! I'm so gross!" He sobbed loudly, pressing the butt of his palm into his eyes.

"Do you want us to get Mantis?"

It was a pretty common occurrence, for Eli to throw a fit and then not being able to comfort him. Once he got his mind set on something he rarely changed his mind. The only person that really seemed to help was Mantis.

"I wan' be a boy! I- I-"

Kaz took a deep breath, grabbing the landline and quickly dialing for Quiet.

"Hello?"

"Hey, we need you to bring Mantis over."

"Is that Eli?"

"Yeah. We need Mantis over."

"Right."

Before long Mantis was there, and pretty much immediately let Eli lay in his lap.

"I hae' it! I's so g'oss!"

"Well, lots of things people do it gross. Eating is pretty gross when you think about it. But it's necessary for our health. Maybe changing from a girl to a boy is necessary for your health."

Eli sniffled.

"Do you think so?"

"Of course I do. I wouldn't be saying it if I didn't."

"Am I a real boy?"

"Of course you are."

* * *

So apparently being an ex-Diamond Dogs leader was pretty useful, when tracking someone down.

_"This is Pequod! Arriving shortly at LZ!"_

Kaz stood, holding Eli's hand, while V held David's. Quiet was sitting on the floor beside them, with Vikki and Mantis gathered around her.

The helicopter lowered itself slowly, and sure enough, out hopped... Big Boss.

He knew it was George, his eye was in tact, but _damn._

The guy looked _exactly like John._


	6. Chapter 6

Immediately Eli bristled. David looked more surprised. Mantis was tensed up. Vikki looked confused.

Quiet rose to her feet, standing next to V and Kaz.

"Hello, George." V tried to sounds warm and welcoming. It sounded more stiff.

Kaz stepped forward to shake his hand. It was weird to think that while the boy in front of him was truly twelve, he looked to be twenty. For fucks sake, he was taller than Kaz himself.

"Hello." His voice was deep, the tiniest bit raspy.

He was truly just a copy of John.

Eli narrowed his eyes, in attack mode already.

[How're you feeling?]

_[Not good.]_

[I assumed so.]

_[I thought David looked like him. This is just... creepy.]_

[I get it.]

"And who is this?" George turned to Eli. He bristled a little more, wishing he had brought along some kind of weapon.

"This is Eli. The second twin."

"The second twin was named Eliza."

"My name is Eli! It's Eli!"

George rolled his eyes. Eli wanted to punch him.

"So, what did you want to talk to me about?"

It was in that second Kaz realized how dangerous this was. Here they were, with someone still connected to Cipher, trying to convince him to turn sides, _near their house._

"Right. We uh, wanted to ask you-" He looked up at V, nervous.

"We wanted to ask if you like being with Cipher."

"Cipher? You mean the La-Le-Lou-Lei-Lo?"

V, Quiet, and Kaz exchanged glances. Eli gripped Kaz's arm, as if trying to protect him.

"Uh- Yes. We wanted to ask you if you like it there."

"It's fine."

"Do you trust them?"

"They made me."

"No! They didn't!" Eli snapped, "Your mother made you! _Our mother! _Your surrogate birthed you! Cipher-" His nose wrinkled, "Had nothing to do with it! All they did was trick Big Boss and lie to the surrogates and manipulate the egg donor!"

George glared down at him. There was a hint of _something_ in his eyes.

Superiority.

Clearly George thought that Eli was the "inferior" one as well.

"Why is she talking to me?" He spoke coldly. "She wasn't addressed. It's bad manners."

Immediately Eli lunged forward, ready to attack him. V had to grab onto him, holding him back to the best of his abilities.

"I'm a boy! A boy! Not a girl! I'm a boy! A real boy!"

At this point Mantis looked ready to attack too.

This was truly a disaster.

"George, if you don't mind, call him a him."

"Why should I?"

God he was even pissing Kaz off. Even Quiet tightened her fists.

"He prefers it. It's better, to him."

"That's silly."

"It's not! I'm a boy!" Eli looked on the edge of tears. That's how he got when he was too angry. V looked over at Quiet. She nodded, picking up Eli, Dave, Mantis, and Vikki. They were gone shortly after.

"George. We have a quick proposition for you. We're getting a bit irritated so we'll make it short. We want to give you a normal life- as normal as it gets. A normal family, two brothers and two fathers, a normal schooling- everything."

George fell silent, turning the idea over in his mind.

"Will I have to live with _her?_"

"Him. Yes, you will live with your two brothers."

He paused again.

"Very well. I assume I won't have contact with the La-Le-Lou-Lei-Lo?"

"No, you will not."

"Alright. I will join you."


	7. Chapter 7

Eli was sitting on the couch when they got home. He was _fuming. _Mantis sat next to him.

"Alright, first, ground rules." Kaz sat on the couch while V stood behind it. Eli glared at George.

"First of all, no matter how old you look, you're still a kid. You will be treated as such." Kaz quirked his brow, looking at George like he was trying to challenge him. Based off what he know of Eli, children of Big Boss were stubborn.

Surprisingly, George just nodded.

"Second of all, you will be home schooled to the best of our ability. Third of all, you have to treat everyone in this house with respect. Especially your brothers. You will not call Eli a girl, you will not tease either of them, or bother them in either way."

At that George furrowed his eyebrows.

"She is-"

"_He _is a boy. He wants to be so he is. You're welcome to the same privilege if you'd like."

Eli tensed next to Kaz. Mantis held his wrist.

"Another thing. This is Mantis. He's Eli's friend and stays here often. You'll treat him with the same amount of respect you would everyone else. He's a psychic and gets headaches without that mask, if you take it off, he could be immobilized."

"Worse." Eli mumbled quietly.

"And soon we will be joined by Hal. He's a little boy. He lives with us during school, but he's at his brother's house right now. You need to be polite. Got it?"

"Of course."

"And finally! And this one is the most important! You will have no contact with Zero or Cipher or the La-Le-Lou-Lei-Lo or whatever they're calling themselves."

George hesitated before nodding. Eli glared.

_[Is he lying?]_

[Surprisingly, no.]

_[He's not bullshitting? Seriously?]_

[Language, Eli. And no, he's being very genuine.]

_[I will attack him if he tries calling me a girl again.]_

[I know. He deserves it.]

Eli got up and walked to his room. Mantis followed.

They sat on the bed, the same way they did constantly, their legs tangled together, and Mantis' head resting on Eli's shoulder.

_[You're warm.]_

They sat in silence for a few minutes.

"I don't like George."

"He's just a kid."

"I don't like him. I don't like how he calls me a girl and I don't like how much he looks like-"

"I know, Eli."

They sat in silence again.

"How're you feeling?"

"I dunno. It's weird."

"I get it. It's okay, Eli."

"I don't- I don't know if I'm a real boy or a real girl."

"We talked about this."

"I know... But- sometimes, when people call me a boy, it feels... wrong. Sometimes. And most times I like it more."

They both fell quiet again. Mantis began to play with his hair. It had been getting longer.

"Why should it matter if you're a boy or a girl? Maybe you're both."

"But that- it's weird!"

"We've been over this. Everything humans do is weird, and gross. But we have to do them."

Eli hesitated before opening his mouth again, "How would I even- communicate that?"

"You could get bracelets."

"But- I just- what if kids make fun of me?"

For a super soldier Eli was surprisingly anxious.

"If they do then you're stronger than them. They have to right to be mean to you just for something that you cannot control."

Eli pushed his face into Mantis' shoulder.

"Why're you so nice to me?"

"Because you were nice to me."

Eli sniffled softly. "Thank you Mantis. I love you."

"I love you too, Eli."

By now Mantis had figured out that love really didn't mean what Eli thought it did.

He didn't mind very much.


	8. Chapter 8

Mantis walked into the small apartment, the door creaking softly. Quiet was already up.

"Sorry for coming back so late, Ms. Quiet."

She quirked her brow at him. Her mind echoed only one word.

_Still?_

He knew that at this point he was expected to call her Mom. He had been living with her for most of the summer.

He never had a positive experience with any kind of parent, unless you count V and Kaz. Other than that it was filled with awkward, halfhearted dinner small talk and verbal abuse.

So he didn't call her mom.

The word had always felt foreign to him. He never had a mother. Although, strangely enough, his mother was the only reason his father had kept him around.

Life was funny like that.

Funny as in sad.

It's sad knowing that your worth is tied to your appearance, and even more so to a dead woman you never met. Especially when you're responsible for her death.

He walked quietly toward the couch, sitting up next to her. She was tall. She had always been tall. He just never noticed before he started actually walking again.

They sat in companionable silence, the TV droning on. He never cared much for TV. Unless, of course, it was something Mr. Kaz played. He preferred books. With books he could imagine what was happening, he didn't have it shoved in his face. He could imagine what each character looked like, how their voice was. It felt more personal.

"By the way, I have a present for you."

Ms. Quiet never talked much. Technically she was still infested with parasites. But the contagious ones had been rendered useless.

She walked to the kitchen, pulling out a book. It had a bright color. The color of fire.

She placed it on his lap. Across the orange and red color it read "CARRIE". Sure enough the picture on the cover was of a fire, with a girl standing in the middle of it.

He felt a knot in his stomach.

Mantis looked up at Quiet, almost as if to say _really_?

She shrugged.

"Thought it would help you, y'know, come to terms."

He wrinkled the remainder of his nose. She gave him a mildly apologetic look.

He knew she wasn't sorry. She wanted the best for him. Why he did not know. He was a monster.

He gave a small thank you before floating to his room. He put the book on his dresser, curling up in the bed. It almost made him forget the long nights with scratchy sheets.

When he closed his eyes he dreamed he was back in his village.

_She followed the looming shape that she knew was her father without even looking. Her footsteps were as light as she could physically make them with the heavy, too-big boots that she stared down at._

_"Her" shoes were actually her father's old ones. They were extremely worn down and barely protected her feet from the snow and cold. And they were, of course far too big._

_"Jdi koupit nějaké maso, holka. Vrátím se před večeří."_

_She knew he was lying. Whenever he went off like this he wasn't back until morning, and even that was a bet. Often times he came back drunk, too._

_But she followed his instructions, still staring at the ground as she walked to the butcher shop._

_The butcher gave her the meat without asking questions. She never spoke. They all thought she couldn't. Oh well._

_As she half-dragged the bag of far too heavy meat back to the small barn she daydreamed about leaving this place. The village was never fun for her. It was filled with people that would carelessly speak ill in front of her, saying she was stupid. At least they thought she could marry rich._

_She had always been considered pretty. She was always told to marry rich to get his money. She didn't want to. All she wanted was someone that loved her back._

_But even the idea of marriage was a silly pipe dream for her. No one would marry an idiot._

_She struggle to put the meat up on the counter. Her frail arms just couldn't heave something so heavy up that high._

_She collapsed onto the ground, her tattered dress spreading out around her._

_She wished she wasn't so weak. So useless. She wished she could lift the damn bag up onto the counter._

_She glared at the bag, as if that would make it move. And suddenly, it did._

_She stared with wide eyes as it floated up onto the counter as if lifted by invisible hands. And she knew it was her doing this._

_She was suddenly excited for when her dad got home. She could finally prove she wasn't entirely useless._

_But first she needed to practice. Who knew she wasn't just hallucinating? Or if it was just a one time power?_

_She walked up the creaking stairs to her father's office. Technically she wasn't allowed inside, but he never went in, and she liked the books he had. He caught her, one. That was one of the most terrifying nights of her life._

_She looked up the tall bookshelf where atop it held her favorite book. It used to be near the bottom, but when he caught her he put it where she couldn't reach. But now she could try._

_She looked up at the familiar green cover. She glared a tiny bit, and before long the thin book floated down into her clumsy hands._

_She smiled. She felt useful._

_The next hours were spent of just her practicing. She kept getting an excited, warm feeling._

_For once her father got home on time. And for once they had a regular dinner conversation. Of course the whole thing was strained, though._

_She had to take care of the dishes. She was never good at that. She was too short._

_But now she could finally make herself of use._

_She tugged at her father's sleeve, leading him to the kitchen._

_"Co potřebuješ, děvče?"_

_She made sure his attention was on her before hesitantly floating a glass up. It was shakier in front of an audience._

_When she turned around she expected him to be proud. Or at least excited._

_His eyes were instead filled with horror._

_"udělal jsi to, jen svou myslí?"_

_She hesitated before nodding._

_"Jste šílenci!" He stuck the side of her head. She gasped, falling off the stool and landing roughly on the ground._

_It was horrifying._

_Freak._

_That's what he thought of her._

_A monster._

_"Už si myslí, že jsem vychoval idiota, teď musíte jít a udělat to!"_

_She stood on shaky legs. Wrong choice. She was struck again. She made a noise she didn't know she was capable of making._

_She still laid on the ground, digging into his mind. She wasn't entirely sure if she could really do it, but when she started she couldn't stop._

_She delved deeper and deeper. And the deeper she went the more hate was there._

_She felt sick._

_Her father hated her. He hated her for taking away her mother, his wife- he hated her for being an idiot, and now a freak._

_She only remembered throwing up after that._

_And then black._

Mantis woke up with a loud shriek. Cold sweat was all over him.

Quiet entered his room, worry painted on her face. He was shaking.

She nodded understandingly, scooping him up in her arms. She was warm. And safe.

He was safe.


	9. Chapter 9

So Kaz ended up telling the school district. About Eli, that is.

And Jesus fucking Christ he regretted it.

The day after Eli was immediately treated differently.

"Can I go to the bathroom?" It was work time, first hour. He should've been allowed to go.

The teacher grabbed the hall pass and handed it to him.

"Remember to go into the girls' bathroom."

Eli froze.

"What?"

"Well, it's based on parts, not what phase you're going through.

She was being sincere.

Eli felt sick. The hall pass cracked in his hand.

"Why are you thinking about a child's parts?" That was all he could say, quickly and quietly. Immediately after he half-ran to the bathroom to escape her wrath, shaking all over.

When he went up to return the pass he was told to go to the office.

He didn't. Why should they care?

Then gym. It was one of his favorite classes. Mostly because he was good at it.

"Alright, we're doing boys versus girls, so separate into your teams."

Eli walked to the boys' side.

"Oh, Eli, that's the boys' side."

His face felt hot.

"Yeah?"

The teacher stared at him like he was an idiot.

"Go with the rest of the girls, please."

Eli was shaking again. It was the last hour of the day, he could ignore it, live with it-

That wasn't what happened.

Immediately Eli burst into tears. He didn't want to cry. He didn't want to be weak.

He could feel his body. Not like he normally did. It felt like a burning sensation creeping between his thighs and along his chest.

He clenched his entire body, almost trying to curl into himself. He couldn't stop.

He felt the distant sensation of someone grabbing him, trying to comfort him. He screamed, shoving himself up against a wall.

[Eli? Eli what's happening?]

He was crying and screaming and he wanted to stop but he _couldn't-_

_[This shouldn't be my body- I can't- I was born wrong- I'm not- I can't-] _He could tell people were staring at him. He wanted to stop so badly.

But the burning sensation was getting stronger.

He had the wrong parts.

This wasn't him.

He wrapped one arm around himself, shoving the other between his clenched legs like it would stop the filthy feeling.

He was going to be sick.

His entire body was shaking.

He felt someone close to him. He wanted to pull away- keep people away from this _wrong _body.

But somehow he just knew it was Mantis. Mantis was safe. He wouldn't judge him.

He heard humming. He wasn't sure what it was but he knew it was coming from Mantis.

He slowly stopped crying, holding his breath. Mantis placed a hand on his shoulder, laying him in his lap.

He kept humming, starting to gently rock his head. He let out a few little whimpers, sniffling.

He wasn't sure how long it went on, but he finally noticed reality when he heard his dad's voice.

"Eli, are you okay?" V asked gently. Eli just clung to Mantis.

He felt himself being lifted up, but he had closed his eyes.

They went home about twenty minutes early.

"What happened Eli?"

Eli didn't respond. He had curled himself into a corner of the car, staring blankly out the window.

Mantis spoke for him. "The teacher told him to go to the girls' side for boys versus girls."

V sighed.

"Alright, your father and I will talk to them.


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> By the way, these sections of Mantis' backstory is inspired by Mothbats' Map of the Mind (https://archiveofourown.org/works/5516150/chapters/12736610)

Mantis still got nightly nightmares.

He never bothered bringing them up. He could handle them.

That's what he told himself.

_You can handle it._

At some point he became afraid to fall asleep at night.

He laid awake, staring at the ceiling. Ironically enough, he was still thinking of the places his nightmares (a more accurate word would be memories, but that's not important,) took place.

His village, the facility, the Devil's House. Even in Skullface's mind, which wasn't necessarily a place but a _feeling, _deep in his gut.

Every night he waited until he passed out, betting in his mind on which horrible memory it would dredge up.

He only blinked. That's how it always was. Shutting his eyes for a brief second, and suddenly he was in a different place, the hazy film of a dream covering it.

_A little girl sat on the exam table, having just woken up. She had her arms strapped down._

This was new. It was the security camera.

_The doctor, two bodyguards and someone else walked in. She stared at them blankly. They started speaking Russian. She didn't know Russian._

_"Kde je moje maska?"_

_The doctor looked at her over his glasses._

_The other man, who looked quite spindly, stepped forward._

_"Vaše nové jméno je Tretij Rebenok. Budu vaším překladatelem, dokud se neučíte rusky. Jakmile to uděláte, jakýkoli náznak češtiny je zakázán."_

_She just stared, waiting for an answer to her question. She didn't get it._

_"Dostanete lékařskou prohlídku, abyste se ujistili, že neztrácíme naše zdroje."_

_She panicked, she had never gotten a medical exam before. Her father said they were scams and too expensive._

_The translator and the doctor spoke is Russian while she tried to think of what to do. She didn't want an exam._

_The doctor started walking toward her. She drew her knees up. She didn't want this to happen. She didn't-_

_She threw the doctor across the room before she realized what was happening. Immediately the two bodyguards practically tackled her. She wasn't sure why, she was already strapped to the table._

_The doctor stood up slowly._

_"Удивительно..."_

_She stared at him, a bit scared. Would he hurt her?_

_"Teď, Tretij, to bylo úplně zbytečné."_

_"Не нужно беспокоиться. Мы просто дадим ему форму."_

_There was a bit of shuffling, and then a clipboard with Czech written on it and a pen clipped to it was set in her lap._

_She stared at it. She knew enough to recognize the text was written in Czech, but she couldn't read._

_The translator must have noticed her confusion after a moment, grabbing the clipboard from her._

_"Юридическое название?"_

_The words that came out of her mouth came out as just static in the dream. It wasn't his life now. He was a new person. Mantis. That was his name. His legal name didn't matter._

_"Юридическое название?"_

_"Мальчик."_

_She panicked. She wasn't a boy, was she? She was a girl- she was always a girl-_

_But something about the way they addressed him as a boy made her feel... better._

_They asked a few more questions before the translator handed the clipboard off to the doctor. They went to another table, and when he glanced over it had all kinds of needles and machinery on it. She wasn't sure what it was for, but she wasn't too keen on having it used on her._

_"Získáte tři tetování. Budou vás identifikovat, aniž byste museli používat krev nebo vlasy."_

_Tattoos? The word seemed innocent compared to the machinery._

_They lifted his sleeve, wiping the area with a wipe that stunk of rubbing alcohol._

_Then, the translator lifted the tattoo gun and-_

_He panicked. He jerked away, nearly falling off the table if it weren't for the fact that his arms were still strapped down. The tattoo gun exploded, spreading ink all over the room._

_They just prepared a new one while one of the bodyguards held him still._

_Then, they took out a needle filled with clear fluid._

_He felt almost sick. He hated injections._

_He tried to struggle when they injected him. It didn't work. Before long he felt light and dizzy, and soon he was passed out._

Mantis shot up. That was one of the more tame ones. He still felt sick.

Hesitantly he reached up, touching the tattoo on the side of his head. He remembered how badly it stung when he woke up.

That was all he was to those people.

A product.

He didn't fall asleep again that night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (Czech)  
"Where's my mask?"
> 
> "Your new name is Tretij Rebenok. I will be your translator until you learn Russian. Once you do, any hint of Czech is forbidden."  
"You will be given a medical exam, to make sure we are not wasting our resources."
> 
> (Russian)  
"Amazing..."
> 
> (Czech)  
"Now Tretij, that was completely unnecessary."
> 
> (Russian)  
"No need to worry. We'll just give them a form."
> 
> (Czech)  
"Legal name?"  
"Are you a boy or a girl?"
> 
> "Boy."
> 
> "You will be getting three tattoos. These will be identify you without having to use blood or hair."


	11. Chapter 11

Everyone was at school when Kaz got a knock on the door. It almost scared him. He was, as usual, hesitant to answer.

When he opened the door he was face to face with a very familiar face.

"Kaz! It's good to see you!" he didn't have time to respond before he was being crushed into her boobs.

"Hello, Eva. What are you doing here?" He pulled away, crossing his arms.

"Well, I heard you found my babies?" She stepped inside without even asking. It had never registered with him before how similar her and Eli were.

"Yes, I found your children."

"Perfect!"

"They're at school right now."

She nodded. "Right. I figured they'd be. That's why I came! I want to know everything about them, I don't want this to be awkward."

He sighed. "Sit down. You're lucky I have the day off."

She seated herself on the couch, crossing one leg over the other.

"First of all, Eliza is now Eli. He will throw a fit if you call him a girl."

She raised an eyebrow. "You'd think with all the genetic modification they'd avoid gender dysphoria."

"Guess not. Also, don't expect them to accept you as their mother. Eli is the only one that even knows and he thinks of you as the surrogate."

She frowned.

"And David is really shy. He's gonna avoid you."

She frowned more.

"They're both really sensitive kids, Eva. It took them months to accept any kind of proper parental figure."

* * *

Eli came home holding Mantis' hand, and David was carrying Hal.

"Hey. So, you both know your uh- surrogate, right?"

Eli nodded. David shook his head.

"Well, she came over-"

Eva walked out into the living room. Mantis immediately started giggling.

[She looks just like you!]

_[We don't share any genes, Mantis.]_

[I know but just look!]

Eva gave them both a warm smile. "Hello!"

Eli stared blankly before promptly leading Mantis to his room. Eva blinked.

"Did I upset him?" She turned to Kaz. She was visibly confused.

"He's not much of a people person."

David snorted, "He just doesn't like strangers. Well, he doesn't like adults but he doesn't bother fighting them."

Eva furrowed her eyebrows, but seemed to accept the answer.

"Well, I'm guessing you're Dave?" She immediately started smiling again. Dave seemed to freeze up before nodding slowly.

"Eva, this is a lot. Maybe you should go for the day?"

She frowned but nodded. "Alright. I'll come back later."


	12. Chapter 12

Eli didn't come over to Mantis' house quite as much as Eli came over to his. He wasn't sure why.

He glanced around the apartment. It had different lighting than his. It was dimmer, even though Kaz always kept the lights a near-off.

Mantis floated over to the kitchen, absently collecting snacks. Eli followed nervously. He hadn't been here in a while.

"Mantis, you weren't floating in public, were you?"

"Uh- No, miss."

"We're supposed to blend in, Mantis. We don't want any kind of attention that would come along with a child floating around."

"Sorry, miss."

Mantis' room was a bit of a mess. Well, an organized mess, at least.

There were binders and pictures thrown around everywhere, books piled alongside them. The Polaroid camera Quiet had bought him was perched lovingly on the bedside table, with a copy of the book he was currently reading (_Carrie, _apparently,) along side it.

There was a cork board filled with pictures of Vikki and Eli. There was barely anything of himself, besides the picture Eli took for fun. The bookshelf pushed against one wall was filled with different gifts from Quiet and overflowing with books.

On the walls themselves were various tests- All a's, of course, Mantis was smart like that. The school had been so impressed that he went from a quiet, stuttering Russian child to an at least somewhat confident English-speaking kid.

The bed itself was pretty plain, although perched along the back was a long white snake that looked like it was smiling. Eli felt a pang of pride at that. A white mamba. Mantis had made it in Home EC.

Mantis floated over to the bed, seating himself. Eli hesitated before sitting next to him. Mantis dumped the snacks between them.

"How're you feeling?"

"Ugh. George is a dick."

"I know. What'd he do now?"

"He keeps calling me Eliza. It's weird. Dad yells at him whenever he catches him. I tried to punch him once but Dad saw and got mad at me."

"Want me to throw him out a window or something?"

They shared a giggle.

"He's a jerk. Too much like his dad."

Mantis hummed out his agreement. Eli laid back on the bed. Mantis followed, floating a granola bar up onto Eli's stomach.

Recently it had been a lot easier to get Eli into a shirt.

[You should talk to your mom about- y'know, puberty and stuff.]

He didn't see Eli deflate, he felt it, the sinking feeling so strong he felt it deep in his own stomach.

_[She's not my mom she's just my surrogate.]_

He was changing the subject.

[Then talk to miss Quiet. I know you're a boy Eli but you still have a girl's body and you're gonna get a girl's puberty. You should know what happens.]

Eli opened the granola bar, chewing at it grumpily.

_[I don't want to.]_

[Eli you at least need a training bra.]

Mantis knew he was being hypocritical. But Eli didn't know, he didn't comment.

_[I don't want one.]_

[You've stopped running as fast.]

_[Whatever! It- Just because- I don't want one!]_

Mantis sighed.

[You should, Eli.]

_[Fine! I will.]_

[Thank you.]

Eli rolled onto his side, grabbing another granola bar.

Mantis took a long, deep breath. He was underweight- that would delay his puberty, right? At least by a few years, considering how much of a skeleton he still was. It's not like he wasn't getting enough to eat, Quiet gave him probably more than enough. He himself didn't eat a lot, though.

Part of him wished he had just told the truth. Another, bigger part of him just wished he hadn't been born like this.


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> gonna upload a few chapters today, sorry I've been having so much trouble keeping up!

The next time Eva came over Eli was hesitant.

He had promised Mantis. He should. He should talk to her.

That didn't shake the sick churning of his stomach.

Thankfully he didn't have to approach her himself. Before long she had entered his room nervously, giving him a gentle smile.

"Hello, Eli-"

He could tell she cut herself off before she said Eliza.

"Hello."

They both fell silent.

"Um- Kaz said you're friends with a psychic?" It was pretty obvious they had nothing else to talk about. Eli didn't have many interests. Most of his time was just spent talking.

"Yes. His name is Mantis."

"That's nice. You're afraid of bugs, though, right?"

"Except mantises. They're really cute."

Eva let out a short chuckle.

"So, you're twelve right now, right?"

He bristled a bit.

"Yes."

"Well, I um, I know you don't like talking about it but, Kaz said it would be good."

He felt a little relieved he wouldn't have to ask about it.

"Yeah?"

She coughed a little. "Well, he said you might need to um, go bra shopping."

"I don't want to."

He promised he would talk about it, after all.

"Kaz said you don't run as much anymore because it hurts."

He didn't respond.

"I get it, Eli. But you should."

Eli made a small grunting noise. Eva sighed.

"I can just take measurements for you and shop without you."

"Thank you."

They sat in silence for a few moments.

"So, how does, um, all this work?"

"What do you mean?"

"Well, all I know is that you want to be a boy, what does that really mean?"

Eli hesitated, "I dunno. It's just like, y'know how your whole life you knew you were a girl? It's like that but I knew I wanted to be a boy- but I was born a girl. And sometimes I'd be fine with both and sometimes I feel like I wanna be a girl. It just, depends."

She raised an eyebrow, nodding. "Do you tell people when you want to be a girl?"

He mumbled, looking to the side. "Well, it's already weird that I want to be a boy so like I don't wanna-"

"Dear," he cringed, "Kaz and V's job is to make you as happy as they can. You're not inconveniencing them by saying how you feel."

He looked up at her. "But-"

"Also, I will kick Zero's ancient ass for you."

He grinned. She gave a gentle smile.


	14. Chapter 14

When Eli woke up in the morning she knew it was going to be an odd day.

She laid in bed thinking for a few minutes. It took her a bit to realize that she wanted to be a girl today, that's why it felt weird.

She dug through her dresser, trying to find the most feminine outfit she had. That ended up being a plain white short sleeved shirt and a pair of denim shorts.

The shirt was small enough that it actually showed the slowly appearing curves on her body. The shorts were a bit small too. She wasn't sure how to feel about it. She liked it and yet, another part of her was trying to shame her. Why couldn't she just pick one?

When she looked in the mirror all she saw was the kid at the facility.

She grumbled softly, tying her hair up in a ponytail. It helped, somewhat. She looked around for something to make herself feel better, ending up finding one of her old bead necklaces.

Good enough.

She finally grabbed the pink beaded bracelet that Tretij had bought her. She'd have to remember to wear them every day.

She walked out to the kitchen nervously. She knew they weren't going to judge her or anything but she still felt bad.

"Good morning, Eli."

Kaz was making breakfast, as usual.

"Good morning."

Kaz looked over and visibly did a double take.

"You okay?"

"Fine." It felt odd, not making an active effort to make her voice deeper. She supposed she liked it today, but any other day it could feel out of place...

"Really? Nothing... happened?" Of course Kaz would naturally assume that the bullying had gotten onto Eli's nerves enough to just stop trying entirely. It probably seemed more plausible than _"I know I've spent the last few months trying to tell you that I am a boy despite being biologically a girl but I actually don't know and sometimes I feel like being a girl"_.

"I'm fine."

"Okay..."

She hesitated, "Sometimes it just feels better."

Kaz raised an eyebrow but seemed to accept it. "Alright. Well, breakfast is almost ready. Vikki is coming over later. Do you wanna go and ask Mantis if he wants to come too?"

She grinned and nodded, pulling on her boots and leaving before even eating. She knew Kaz would've protested if he noticed before she was out the door, but he didn't.

The walk was quite familiar to her. She walked it at least every weekend, of course. Not that she went to Mantis' house often, but she just felt better being able to escort him home. Especially when they stayed late. Mantis would never be able to defend himself, but Eli could.

It was familiar to the point where she rarely looked up, not many people really walked along the path anyway. It was rare she'd run into someone.

But of course she just had to run into one of her teachers.

"Oh! I'm sorry miss." The teacher, Mrs. Kovolich, helped her up. She felt a hint of panic.

"It's- it's fine- sorry." She dusted herself off. A small part of her thought it was funny- on the rare occasion she did run into someone as a boy they hardly ever apologized. Life really was different as a girl.

She seemed to recognize her but didn't say anything, just continuing down the street. She let out a relieved breath.

The rest of the walk continued in hurried silence. When she got to the apartment complex she didn't even need to knock- as Quiet had told him some time ago.

"Hey Eli." Speaking of, Quiet was perched on the counter. He barely thought twice about it, the whole family was odd. Then again the family consisted of two people with supernatural powers, so...

She actually knocked when it came to Tretij's door. There was a solid minute or so before it creaked open and the snout of Tretij's mask poked through.

"Hi Eli."

"Hi!"

It was nice having a psychic friend. You didn't have to explain when you did something unexpected.

"Do you wanna come over later? Vikki's coming too!"

"Of course." He opened the door wider, putting his face against Eli's collarbones. She giggled a little.

"Why are you so tiny? You're like, the same size you were when we got here!" For emphasis she lifted him up off the ground, up to her height. It really wasn't much, but the separation of about four inches seemed big to any child.

"I am not! You're just growing faster than everyone!"

"Nope, you're just tiny."

"Mean."

"Am not!

"Yes you are!"

"Shut up! I love you."

"I love you too Eli."


	15. Chapter 15

"Can I go to bathroom?"

"_May _I go to _the _bathroom."

Unfortunately, even though Mantis' English was mostly perfect, he still had to take language classes. They said it was partly to make his accent more decipherable. He felt the tiniest bit offended by that- no one ever had problems with his accent.

"May I go to the bathroom?"

"Yes, you may."

At least this year the teacher was nice. She always smiled and never made him do something he didn't want to. Maybe because Quiet intimidated them. Probably.

He left quickly, scanning through each bathroom to see which was empty. He needed to pee and always hated any weird looks he got when they heard him peeing in a stall. Luckily they were always not observant enough to notice that he was sitting down when he did it.

He found the closest empty bathroom- the one over the next; there was a kid smoking in the other one. When he got there he slipped inside a stall, making sure it was locked. He couldn't lock the entire bathroom door unfortunately, that would get him in trouble.

He went as quickly as he could. He didn't want to deal with all that.

Apparently he didn't keep a close enough eye on the bathroom door. When he exited the stall there was a boy standing there- He didn't look familiar, maybe from eighth or ninth grade?

But that was beside the point. Someone had heard him peeing in a stall. 

"Why would you go in a stall? Why not go in the urinals?" They wrinkled their nose. Mantis felt himself tense.

"I- Um-"

"Are you that kid in seventh grade that always says she's a boy when she's a girl?" He glared slightly.

"No! No, uh-"

He cut himself off when a hand met his crotch.

There were a few tense moments of silence before Mantis' panic fully registered with him. It took the other guy about the same amount of time that he was not, in fact, touching a dick.

Right as the guy opened his mouth Mantis threw him clear across the bathroom. He then ran out of the bathroom, not bothering to wash his hands, and out of the school entirely. Fortunately Quiet wasn't one to ask questions.

* * *

Unfortunately, the school _was._

_"Hello, Ms. Тихий?"_

It was the English Learning teacher.

"Yes, hello. May I ask why you're calling?"

_"Well, you may or may not know that your son was marked gone for every class after mine. He went to the bathroom and never came back."_

"Yes, I am aware. I was going to call in to excuse his absence."

_"Well, one eight grade boy went up to the office to report that someone matching your son's description was in the boy's bathroom but, well, um... Didn't have..."_

Quiet raised an eyebrow at Mantis. He just looked down.

"You don't need to go on ma'am. I trust that since you work with him you know Eli?"

_"Yes, I do."_

"And you know his situation, yes?"

_"Right. I, uh, understand. But for his health we need to disclose this-"_

"Ma'am, based off how Eli has been treated by his peers and teachers, I do not want this information to be disclosed to anyone."

_"Well, the office is considering suspending Mantis-"_

"What exactly happened?"

_"He went to the bathroom and, according to the other student, went into a stall. The student was curious so he grabbed his um-"_

"You expect me to let my son stay home because a child grabbed his crotch?"

_"Well, he threw the kid across the room."_

"Good! I don't know what you're teaching your students but evidently you are not teaching them to respect others and their bodies. If he faces any discrimination I will be moving him to a different school." She made sure her voice was threatening. It wasn't hard.

When they both hung up she turned to Mantis. He was sitting at the dining room table focusing a little too intently on his math homework.

"So when did you plan on telling me?"

His entire body felt hot with shame.

"I... didn't plan on it."

"Did you even tell Eli?" He sunk further into his chair. "Oh, Mantis. Come on. No one would judge you."

He knew that. He knew they wouldn't. He just... couldn't bring himself to say it.

He felt like crying.

Everyone had been nothing but good to him. Miss Quiet especially. She had even been the one to make it so he could wear his mask to school. And he couldn't even call her his mom.

"I- I'm sorry, m-- miss."

"It's alright. Do you want to tell Eli?"

He felt like puking up what little was in his stomach.

_Eli._

He got hurt when Mantis didn't tell him the smallest of things. He would only ever be upset if he told him.

"No, miss."

"You should."

He just shook his head.


	16. Chapter 16

Eli was upset.

Mantis knew he was upset as soon as he woke up.

He had found out. He had found out that Mantis had lied.

Mantis felt ready to puke. There was a swirling, terrible feeling deep in his chest, gripping and weighing down on him like he was about to suffocate.

Usually, how it went, now that Kaz was still asleep when they had to leave for school, is that Eli would leave early, grab Mantis from his apartment, and then they'd all walk to school together.

It didn't happen today.

Mantis walked just far enough behind them to watch them walk. He was nearly late.

When he got into the doors he practically ran to first period. Home EC, which he had with Eli. They even sat next to each other. It'd be fine, right? They could talk. It'd be fine.

As soon as Eli walked in- right before the bell rang- he took one look at Mantis, and promptly walked over to the teacher to ask to go to the bathroom. His mind was filled with nothing but betrayal.

When he was, of course, denied, he walked over with nothing but a sharp glare toward Mantis.

[Eli? Can we talk?]

He was being ignored. He stayed staring at his back for a few solid moments before turning away, looking down at the table.

[I'm sorry Eli.]

_[Fuck you.]_

He didn't have the heart to scold him for his language. He just stared at the table, absently scratching his arms.

That was how the rest of the day was spent, with Eli avoiding him. Mantis felt ready to puke.

Lunch was spent alone. He didn't eat. He wasn't hungry.

He walked home alone, too. Usually he would ride in Kaz's car, but he said he didn't want to. He did. He really did. He wanted to be close to Eli, to laugh with him again and complain about all the assholes in the world.

When he got home Quiet was already in the doorway.

"He's angry, isn't he?"

Mantis practically collapsed onto the couch, bursting into tears. He struggled to take off his mask with his shaky hands, sobbing loudly. His whole body was shaking, and as soon as the mask was off his mind protested, a headache starting immediately.

"Mantis! Hey, listen, it's fine. He'll forgive you."

He wanted to disagree, but he was a bit busy sobbing. He pushed the butt of his palm against his eyes, shaking like a leaf.

"Mantis! Listen, do you want me to get him to come over?"

"No!" He brought his knees up, pressing his face into them.

Quiet grabbed him by the shoulders, holding him against her chest. He could hear the thousands of little buzzes of parasites.

* * *

The next day Mantis moved spots. He could feel Eli's anger when he heard him talking to the teacher.

He didn't eat lunch again.

He was really hungry. He hadn't eaten dinner last night. Or breakfast for that matter.

But as soon as he took a bite of his sandwich he stopped. It tasted... tasteless.

He got home and sat on his bed, staring at the walls that were covered in pictures of Eli. He wanted to cry again.

"Mantis! Come on, we're gonna go eat at Kaz's."

He felt his stomach churn. But, not one to argue, he grabbed Quiet's hand and followed her down the street.

When they arrived Eli answered the door. He glared for a second before just walking inside. Mantis shrunk back a little, practically hiding behind Quiet.

He sat on the couch, trying to make himself as small as possible.

"Mantis, are you gonna come eat?" V asked gently. Even though he was being as gentle as he could Mantis still shrunk back.

"I'm, um, I'm not hun- hungry."

Eli audibly scoffed from the other room.

"Are you sure?"

"Yes. I-I'm fine."

"Oh for fucks sake!" Eli stood up on a chair, "Just come eat! These people _care _about you! They're trying to be nice!"

"_Eli! Language!_"

Mantis shrunk back even more, staring down at his lap. He could feel his eyes watering.

"I-I'm sorry..."

"God!"

Eli marched over, grabbing Mantis' wrist and dragging him to the table. Mantis was shaking.

"_Eli_!" Quiet grabbed his arm, pulling him away from Mantis, "This has gone too far. If you're not going to talk to him then leave him alone at least."

Eli huffed, giving Mantis a glare. He shrunk back even more.

"I'm sorry." His voice was quiet. Too quiet. Eli rolled his eyes.

"Fine." Eli wrinkled his nose. "We can talk."

"Great. Why don't you two go to your room?"

Mantis gave Quiet a look. He didn't want to be alone with Eli.

Eli lead Mantis to his room, still scowling. Mantis stood against the door awkwardly.

They sat in silence for a few seconds, before Eli looked up. His face was streaked with tears and his eyes were red. "Why- why wouldn't you tell me?"

"I.." Mantis curled up into himself. "I'm sorry Eli."

"I thought that we had no secrets between us."

"I'm so sorry."

"Stop apologizing! Just tell me why, Mantis." He walked forward, standing in front of Mantis. He flinched back with a cringe. He didn't want to cower in front of him like that- but the looming presence distinctly reminded him of his father.

"i-I don't know- I just- I didn't know if you would freak out- and then when I did know it was too late- and- and-" He fidgeted with the hem of his sweater.

Eli leaned forward, wrapping his arms around Mantis. He shuddered violently, trying to pull away, only to get pulled closer.

"Mantis, listen, it's okay. Everything is fine, I'm not that mad."

"You are!" He had started crying without even realizing it.

"I was, Mantis, but I'm not now."

"But- But- I-"

"It's okay, Mantis." He sat down fully, bringing Mantis down to the floor with him.

"I'm sorry."

"Don't be. You haven't done anything."


End file.
